Fan Donations to the National Football League on the Rise
14 March 2014
NEW YORK – Many American football fans may not realize that
the National Football League (NFL) is not a corporation, but a tax-exempt
organization.
But recently some real die-hard fans have been donating
money to their beloved NFL, even though their donations are not tax-deductible.
“Football is my life,” says Wayne Smetsky of Green Bay,
Wisconsin, who recently donated $500 to the NFL. “Ever since I was a kid, I’ve
watched football every Sunday. Watching football has brought me so many hours
of happiness that I’m happy to give a little bit back to the league. Hell, they
just gave me a raise to $9.50 an hour at my security guard job. And my parents
don’t make me pay any rent to sleep in their basement, so I’m happy to share my
good fortune and do my part to keep the NFL afloat.”
Greg Samsor of Washington, DC agrees. “My life would be totally
meaningless without football. Sometimes I worry that some stupid head trauma class
action suit will bankrupt the NFL. We GOT to keep the NFL going, so I’m
willing to do my part.” Samsor donated $1,500 from his $5,000 savings account.
NFL spokesman John Manley admitted: “While the NFL is a
tax-exempt organization, it is not a charity. We do not solicit donations. It
is true that some fans have donated money to the league in recent years. The
NFL promotes the great game of football! Our tax-exempt status allows us to pay
the NFL Commissioner his well-deserved $30 million salary and meet other
legitimate league expenses. If the NFL had to pay taxes, that would obviously hinder
our ability to recruit top executive talent, such as the current Commissioner, who
works very hard. This would impede our activities in promoting the great game
of football.”
“I know that football players, coaches and owners make pretty
good money,” said Sandy Fields, of Wichita, Kansas. “But I love football so
much that I thought I would rather donate to the NFL than the Red Cross. With
the NFL, I can clearly see where my money is going. Football defines what
America is today, so it’s worth every penny. What has the Red Cross done
lately? I haven’t seen them around much.”
Todd Swanson of Boston agrees: “While the few Americans who
are not football fans may find donating to the League strange, the average
American is actually grateful for all that the NFL has done for us. The NFL
plays an important role in keeping people’s minds off the financial crisis and
all of the wars in the Middle East.”
According to NFL spokesman Manley, the NFL has also kept
up-to-date with the security requirements of America’s favorite sport.
“The NFL is also leading the way in welcoming the courageous
officers of the TSA, as well as their universally-loved body scanner technology,
into all its stadiums in the near future. Soon football fans of all ages can
enjoy being scanned and have a moment of intimate physical contact as they
enter to stadium to watch America’s favorite contact sport.”
“It’s reassuring to know that fans can watch NFL action
without any fear that the boogie man or anyone else will jump out and get them.
God bless America! And God bless the NFL!” concluded spokesman Manley.